We live in the world as if our personal story is the true one. At an authentic motivational level that may serve us well. We would then move mountains if need be to achieve what we desire. The reality is that only a few of us have this powerful spiritual (not necessarily associated with a religion or any form of religion) belief endowed within us that we are prepared to do anything to move forwards. The sad thing is most of us are caught up in a web of where belief is taken for fact and thinking is truncated leaving obstacles about us. All that leads to over generalisations of our selves within that web such that we cannot see beyond: Our behaviour is shaped likewise and fears surfaced matching it and ‘confirming’ that limitation. We recalled what others have said about us. It has left a deep wound within us. We are tormented. Yet we cannot shrug free as we have adopted and accepted it after years and years of being told that this is so. And so we relate to the world in that manner. In a minor form, we feel worthless. In an extreme form, we are just depressed as if the weight of the world is against us and with it everyone about us. Verily, we do not trust anyone. For that matter, we do not trust ourselves either. We have lost all hope as if the other is a perpetual threat to my being. And so we live life in a truncated form, disregarding the fact the world is not run on mistrust. On the other hand society itself paints a pale picture of reality where pain, sorrow ,distraught and fear has emerged as categories that has currency due to the not-me being always a danger which gains more currency in daily life rather than ideas of positivity where we may be encourage not to mistrust the other completely. Stories of violence, hate, despair and terror continue to surface which little helps one who is already cornered into subjugation. At home and school we are taught ‘trust no one’: Education is based on fear. There is a lack of mistrust all round. How can we trust any other, rightly or wrongly whether that person is our parent, teacher, leader or carer? That fear has left us all drained. It takes its tolls more in the one who espoused that trend of negativism as the subject does not have that vitality to move onwards or see beyond that which is being exposed. Rather one remains contented with that norm and indeed find solace of an enclosed world reflecting that vicious circle.
At a negative level that gives us cause for concern where we may feel that we are worthless, suffer from lack of confidence and have the inferiority complex or that we deserve nothing better. And society with its daily stories of hate, hypocrisies, mistrust and lack of faith (atheism, not of a religious form!) simply makes the subject even hazier!
Our thoughts in a way dominate feelings and all this often leads us to actions or no actions in that there is so much baggage that has crept in. That baggage or dirt continues to amass within us, our thoughts and before we know where we are, we lie there within it. And so, we cannot shrug free as it has become part of our being. Our world is seen through the eyes of accumulated dirt which has grown and grown and collected weeds about and so we cannot see. We are so engrossed. It has become our world. That is our story!
From all that is meant we generalise and distort reality and or generalise things according to this view which continually belittles us. We are here and down and out because we are not worthy of anything. And so behave and believe and with belief comes acknowledgement that we are so. And nature likewise complies. That feeling of being no good and that ‘the others are better than me’ dominates the agenda of one who chooses to be in distress. It is their choice to be in that way. One can always choose to be or not to be. Not to choose essentially means choosing or to stay within that web of the gremlin where we are stuck and can never move from or dare to cut free that chain of subjugation which was brought about from somewhere, imposed upon us through our upbringing, sometimes closed ones and by others who influenced so much that we dare not live our life but abide by that truncated view which have been forced upon us. We dare not leave all that behind as it has in a way becomes a reality for us and once we have espoused; we see no other way out!
The Coach may take one out of this vicious web and make you aware of what you have missed and will miss should you choose to remain within that realm of negativity. He will not provide you another agenda but will make you realise that you are caught up in your world because of your own thought. You will come to understand that Reality is with a big R and accommodate every other and not simply as one would have painted it and live by it. There is that bigger dimension untapped where one may choose to explore. The exploration is undertaken by looking at one’s own limited view and asking us to probe deep into all that which has become a hindrance. It is at an assessment level and may be called understanding where we are.
This understanding process makes us realise that we are indeed caught up in a web. It also makes us realise that there is an alternative world view which if adopted may lead us on to more good and great things in life. What happens if I choose to be as I am? What may happen if I choose to break the chains of subjugations? Are you ready to move forwards and onwards? The choice of course is yours…….
Addendum: Miles Downey says that people have a unique map of reality; not of reality itself; some of which as we have observed are authentic, in line with progress and achievement for all whilst others possess a form which belittles sometimes not only others but oneself at a deeper level where if remain unchecked may cause outer or inner self destruction. To check this often requires reflection and indeed one may not be able to do so if all we have done in our life is simply to follow our instincts which do not serve us well all the time. Pray reflect, reflect and reflect. Sometimes, we need an inspiration from our inner voice and a comrade to get us out of this rut. That inner voice may well be a coach, or this is what I think a coach in essence is…. Someone’s inner voice in dialogue with the self but choosing this option means that this inner voice is outside of us, some other who readily is there fully and totally committed towards listening to and awakening that deep conscience of yours in a synergy of being! On the other hand, one may also continue with one’s world, that special unique view which if authentic may serve your family, friends, society, the world and ultimately God may say some if adhered to. Yet my cry is towards others who are not in balance or the title of this blog could have been ‘ Check our story of the world’.